Don't feel sorry for yourself. Only assholes do that. That's what I'll keep reminding myself, except I'm panicking a lot. I've been experiencing a lot of short term memory loss, time lapses where I can't remember anything and wake up with bruises. I need to go get a new asthma pump, my breathing is getting too shallow and worst lately. Forget the rest of it. Just forget it. Oh, and get the fuck to work, dull it out and just do it.

Another band I've been listening to a lot more lately. It's rare for me listen to a band's whole album and like every song but lately there has been quite a few exceptions. It's hard to pick a favorite from the albums but here are a couple that I started out with- Seabird ♥

Don't you remember
You were happy when you were younger
Things were so simple yeah
'Til the day he walked out on your mother
But now you blame yourself
Because you're by yourself
You feel like it's not gonna to change
You're crying on the floor cause you can take no more
Looking for a way to escape
And all this time saying you were fine
And everyone still to blame
Well there you are
You and your broken heart
It's written all over your face
Don't you know
Don't you know that you're beautiful yeah
I see you laughing
But I know inside that you're crying
Just tell me what happened when things went wrong
We'll try to make sense of it all
Please don't blame yourself
Cause you're not by yourself
I've been right here all along
Don't have to be alone
Because you've always know
Wherever your heart is my home

I'm pushing up daisies, I wish they were rosesI feel like I'm drowning but nobody knows itI'm pushing up daisies, I wish they were rosesI feel like I'm dying, just want you to notice

I really need to figure out a way to post music without Youtube videos, I really don't like seeing the videos, sometimes they're so retarded it ruins the image I have of the song or sometimes I just really don't feel like seeing them. I only need the music, I can keep my own imagery. Kind of like how I prefer to listen to a song first without ever seeing the video as compared to first hearing the song with a video... Not sure why I'm under the impression that it takes away the full experience of music I guess. Maybe I'm just weird... but seriously, no one gives a shit right? Right.

Labels: bad habits, escapism, health, lyrics, memories, mentality, music, school, sleep