Ticking away the moments that make up a dull day
Fritter and waste the hours in an off-hand way
Kicking around on a piece of ground in your home town
Waiting for someone or something to show you the way

Tired of lying in the sunshine staying home to watch the rain
You are young and life is long and there is time to kill today
And then one day you find ten years have got behind you
No one told you when to run, you missed the starting gun

And you run and you run to catch up with the sun but it's sinking
Racing around to come up behind you again
The sun is the same in a relative way, but you're older
Shorter of breath and one day closer to death

Every year is getting shorter, never seem to find the time
Plans that either come to naught or half a page of scribbled lines
Hanging on in quiet desperation is the English way
The time is gone, the song is over, thought I'd something more to say

You'd think once you hit rock bottom you wouldn't sink anymore, but why does it feel like I'm still drowning at the bottom... It's been ages since I wrote here but I rather rant to myself than talk to anyone because it's just the same old vicious cycle of me relapsing. It'd just be a hassle to even say so.


Life doesn't stop for anybody, but I can't seem to recover. I'm just trying to pass by the day, and it's been years of the fucking same thing. My mind won't shut down when it constantly runs in manic cycles of things that fuck me up. All the pretty words and all the lies. Don't leave me any pretty words that means nothing when your actions says the polar opposite.

People say if you don't have any expectations, then it won't hurt or at least not as much. But I can't say you ever really get used disappointment— To be put on a pedestal, only to be shoved off and walked all over and left behind; I can't help but feel the bitter regret it leaves behind permanently.

Labels: bad habits, i don't fucking know., this is how things end